Destructive Incorporated

This last weekend was my friend Carissa's birthday. So, to celebrate, she wanted to buy herself an iPod. I lost my Apple store virginity because of her...

I guess I never really put that much thought into what an Apple store would actually be like. Here's how I saw it:
First thing I noticed was how many fucking ipods there were laying around. People were flocking around them like they had never seen one before. I picked up a nano and tried to get a song playing, but it didn't have anything loaded on it, wow. So then I picked up the one next to it and wanted to see what kind of stuff came loaded on em - I quickly found James Blunt and put the headphones on my girlfriend's head and moved on.
Next thing I noticed was some huge bitch of a 30" lcd screen attached to a quad core computer. It was running logic express and had a usb midi keyboard attached, and some emo punk in front of it. I was like wow zomg wtf this machine is awesome I want to play with it. But that emo kid was checking his email and I didn't want to read about his depressing life over his shoulder so I moved on...
I thought I would find something else, but I kept having to dodge around people groping the ipods oblivious to others around them. Then I saw more emo kids, fondling ibooks and other icomputers or whatever they're called. They were all basically either on myspace or checking their email.
By the time I made my round around the store, that kid had gotten off of the beast of a machine I had drooled over earlier. I grabbed the mouse, marveled at the screen, and then thought to myself "Oh shit, I have no idea how to use this fucking computer."
After about 10 minutes I figured out how to open an internet browser and proceeded to check my email...

I'm glad these machines are hella expensive, so I won't ever be tricked into buying one by some clever emo.

Then I called jrr up, and was like, "I lost my apple store virginity! Macs are confusing..." and he was like "No they're not! They're just too intuitive for you."
I think when I try for about 5 minutes to right mouse click and then remember their's only one mouse button, it's just not worth it...

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Don't get me wrong, my life sucks about equally as much at best buy...